The Revolution is Here!

Look!

I’m sick and tired of turning on the news and hearing some pundit blame me for the meltdown of the global economic structure.

Believe me, I didn’t do it!

When my wife and I bought our home we did it the old-fashioned (read ‘correct’) way. We made sure we could pay the mortgage each month. We made sure we came up with a twenty percent down payment. And we made sure to get a fixed rate.

Sure, we bought an old split-level ranch that needs work. No cathedral ceilings. No marbled foyer. Small closets. Clunky old bathroom.

But we bought what we knew we could pay for. After twenty-two years I continue to pay for it, on time, each month.

I also pay off my credit card balance each month.

So to the dour economic analysts who stare at me from the television screen so severely, as though expecting me to shoulder the cause of their fear and panic, and who judgmentally pronounce, “Who’s to blame for the mess on Wall Street. Well, we all are,” I have only one thing to say:

“BITE ME!”

I’ll tell you who’s to blame. The greedy runaway free-market capitalist speculators who wanted to get something for nothing as quickly as possible are to blame.

The only good thing to come out of this whole mess is the nationalization of a large part of the economy. Why is this a good thing? Because it’s happened during a Republican administration. That’s amusing.

The same party that has screamed for smaller government, that gutted and hobbled regulatory agencies, that has sought to privatize as much of the federal government as possible, that has foretold the demise of Medicare and Social Security because of bureaucratic mismanagement, that has wagged it’s finger at the American people for shouldering our grandchildren with unbearable governmental debt,

I say this same Republican Party has now taken the biggest step toward a socialized American economy in modern times.

Bush came into office prepared to dismantle the federal government and hand it over to his plutocrat robber-baron buddies.

As he leaves office the federal government owns a larger part of the economy than ever in modern times.

Now, some might call this socialism. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Unfortunately, I’m afraid the right-wing pundits will avoid the term by pointing out that, unlike under true socialism, ordinary people are not receiving any benefits as a result of hundred of billions of dollars in federal bailouts.

Still, I bet they’re glad those tax cuts didn’t come before they had a chance to rob the federal coffers to save their capitalist asses.

Bottom line, the unregulated free-market fucked up. The revolution has come. And it was led by Wall Street.